We had something awkward to talk about with Tammy

Breakfast 21/09/2017

After much thought and consideration on how to handle this delicate situation, Clint and Kara finally decided today was the day to confront the erect elephant in the room. I.e Tammy's nipples.

Call it an intervention for the good of the George Breakfast brand. 

Everytime the trio are in a photo, doesn't matter the guest, it's Tammy's nipples that steal the show. 

One kinda points West one kinda points East... it's like it opens up a 90 degree vortex.

Actually forget photos, just being around Tammy and his two engorged nips can cause an all-consuming distraction.

When he's wearing two shirts and rubbing up against Jacinda Ardern...  

Even when he's wearing a jumper. 

Especially when he's wearing nothing. 

When he's voting... 


Feeling a little orgasmic over ice cream...

Extra erect when chopping wood... 

How can our guests be expected to feel comfortable, safe and capable of reaching a pinnacle in conversation when there's two small but aggressive pinnacles staring them down? 

"One kinda points West one kinda points East... it's like it opens up a 90 degree vortex," explains Clint. 

Tammy produly proclaims; "the old tractor beam, pulls you in," 

Is it the temperature? Is it some kind of erotic thing? 

Dr. Alex has hypothesised if Tammy was an animal "which isn't too hard to imagine... his erect nipples would likely be caused from over-suckling..." 

Whatever you're into mate. We're not judging here, and we're definitely not trying to body shame. Be proud of who you are, but maybe, just for the good of the show, try a padded bra in the morning?

Take control of your life. Take control of your erectus nipplus.