74-year-old man got half his church blazed off some sticky icky cookies


Church-goers often seem high off life and their love of Jesus. Sometimes, turns out, they're just straight high. 

Vice have reported on a 74-year-old man, identified only as Mr. Jones, who got six of his congregation members mad stoned after he bought weed cookies to the St. John’s Apostle Catholic Church in Bloomington, Indiana last year.

“Forget about breaking the bread duuude, have a cookie.”

What a guy.

Unfortunately, maybe Jones cooked the THC to sugar ratio, as several congregants, aged 12 to 70, complained about cookies that were “unusually salty”… And then they winded up in the emergency department as a result of chowing down on SIN in a chocolate chip-covered disguise. 

Mr. Jones admitted to making the cookies but denied adding any extra green trimmings. Until the police searched his home and found a cheeky bottle of hash oil... 


Mr. Jones has been charged with possession and criminal recklessness.

Meanwhile back at church, Father Daniel Mahan is still “praying for everyone involved.”