You know the 'rich kid syndrome' type. Come on. We all know one. At least one.
Drives an Audi Daddy bought them. Calls themselves an "entrepreneur" on Instagram... only they've never actually worked a real work day in their life, cause their trust fund could already buy them a sea-view apartment in Herne Bay.
The type that’s genuinely baffled you're working 30 hours in a hospo job, while you study full time, just to survive. Instead of volunteering at a cool PR firm and making "contacts" like them…
That's just how oblivious they are to their own privilege.
They tend to get really exhausted on a Friday avo, cause damn that tanning appointment (#summer), then that champagne brunch with their semi-famous blogger friend (who they don't actually like, but hang out with for “appearances” #forthegram), and then that private crossfit session (#fitspo) has really taken it out of them.
So, cheers to the mother fucking weekend.
Whenever they want to catch up with you, they’ll tell you to go to a bar so fancy, the bouncer won't let you in, cause you didn’t get the must-wear-Gucci memo.
20 minutes later, they show up and start making "jokes" about railing lines with the cool looking door girl in a Ms. Crab jumpsuit, who has literally not said one word to you in the entire 20 minutes you were standing there, very awkwardly.
Then after rich kid has acknowledged everyone more important looking than you, they finally send a big friendly “heeeeey babe" in your direction, and kiss your cheek.
And, snap, just like that, Ms.Crab and the bouncer are your best friends.
"Baaaaabe, you should have said who you were WITH!"
Once inside, your little rich kid immediately start whinging about the fact they're not Instagram famous yet.
God damnit! They've only got two thousand followers on the Gram even though they've been really trying some new, different, fun angles with their Acai Bowls.
Life is not fair.
From there, they order two bottles of Veuve and a round of cocktails (at once), then expect you to cop half the bill when the waiter with the portable eftpos machine turns up - Yes. They're so financially unaware, they don't understand this is exactly why normal people preload off their brains or buy three house beers inside the bar, then nip around the corner to shotgun the Cody's they've hidden in the bush.
NORMAL PEOPLE DON'T SPEND $250 ON ONE SHITTY BOTTLE OF WANKER JUICE ON A WEDNESDAY NIGHT.
That’s a week's rent mate…That you’re barely affording in the first place, mind you.
They’re spending more time putting cat ear filters on their face and uploading close ups of the ice bucket to their Instagram story, than drinking or talking to you... so, you drink all the booze.
How else are you going to cope with this weird af night?
Okay, BACK UP... Think we may have fallen down a hypothetical rich kid rabbithole... Probably painted a vivid enough picture…
Look, okay, rich kids aren’t inherently bad people. Some of them can be very sweet. It’s not their fault they are the way they are. They don't know any better. The "rich kid syndrome" is real. And it's a fucking problem.
Some of them, probably deep down -or two bottles of Veuve later- do feel sad and empty inside.
But fucking fuck. Sometimes the shit they do makes you want to punch their priviledged little faces right out.
Recently, Redditor Colonel Swift posted this beautifully apt question: What's the worst case of 'rich kid syndrome' you've seen?
And the thread went off.
Here's some of the best responses:
"My friend was Chinese Canadian. She worked as an English tutor for the Chinese Uni students. Her role was to teach them functional English, help their pronunciation and work with them on essays etc. What ended up happening was her teaching these students life skills (eg. how to use a washing machine, how to grocery shop etc.) She had to call one family because they were sending the 19 year old kid US $25,000 a month for living expenses. This was back when a student apartment was like $600 a month on average (90's.) She explained to the parents that the amount was excessive. The parents chuckled about it but didn't stop."
A kid in my graduating high school class was very wealthy. His parents bought him a Land Rover when he was 16 and he crashed it into a school bus. They bought him another Land Rover and he lost it street racing. Guess what? They bought him a Mercedes.
"Classmate at university was from Qatar. Family owned large shares in a bank and was generally very deeply involved with the financial world in the Middle East. Needless to say they were disgustingly filthy rich.
First day on campus we all decide to play soccer so he goes to his room to change. When we come back from playing we all go back to his room and when we walk in, his clothes were still exactly where he threw them on the floor. He lost his shit at the idea that nobody would clean his room for him and that he had to do his own laundry.
He ended up going shopping every 2-3 weeks for really nice and expensive clothes and would throw them out after wearing them a few times because he didn't want to do laundry. I'm talking about a Brooks Brothers button down shirt worth over $100 only being worn once or twice before ending up in the trash."
"Hey guys please help? Which car should I get, I want a lot but daddy will only buy me one."
This was posted to Facebook by a tinder match. Yeah I'd rather not go there."
“Dude would stand in a club and rip up bills of 10 euro yelling "this is nothing to me!". Okay, how about just giving away beer instead of antagonizing anyone in sight.”
"Girl in my highschool physics class offering her brand new iphone to be destroyed in an experiment because "my dad will just buy me a new one". She had it for like 1 week."
"When I was a broke-as-fuck bike messenger, I was dating a woman who was heir to a major restaurant fortune. One evening, she wanted to go to a club downtown, and I said I couldn't go because I didn't have any money. She said I should come on anyway so I figured she's footing the bill."
When we got to the club and it's time to pay the cover at the door, she pays for herself and starts to walk in. I'm like, "hey--I don't have any money. I can't get in." She comes back out and tells me to just put it on my credit card, but of course I don't have one. The she tells me she'll drive me to an ATM. But of course I don't have a bank account because I'm broke.
I'm standing there in the street with her, trying futilely to explain that I literally do not own any money. She could not grasp the concept. I ended up walking home and she went to the club.
We did not last long."
"I volunteer for Burning Man, which happens to attract some of the worst trustafarians I have ever seen. People who claim to live bohemian lifestyles of art and magic, that also have unending parental support for their magical globetrotting adventure.
It's frustrating, because these people live in the most sheltered bubble of all. I can't even begin to describe how infuriating it is to deal with folks who can drop $50,000 on a week at a festival."
To reiterate, rich kids aren't BAD people... well not all of them. But a good vent is cathartic, healthy even... So, if you enjoyed the above, read the full thread here.