Aussie McD's customers now get potato fritters and hokey pokey shakes, but what about us mate?
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Aussie McD's customers now get potato fritters and hokey pokey shakes, but what about us mate?

"I’m sure they'll be ordered at 3 am by many a drunken 20-something-year-old.”

Our Australian brothers and sisters can now order potato fritters and hokey pokey thickshakes from their local Maccas, but us New Zealanders aren't getting the same treatment. 

Maccas officially introduced the new items on the 12th of January in a media release. “A true Aussie icon,” they call the potato fritter - well, they don’t actually call it a ‘fritter’. Instead, they call it a ‘potato scallop’ which is just disgusting, to be honest. 

If it’s any consolation, a viral review of the ‘potato scallop’ makes it sound like we aren't missing out on much. 

“From the first bite, my fears were confirmed,” the Potato Cake Appreciation Society wrote on Facebook. “This couldn’t compete with any fish and chip shop’s discus chip.”

“The cake lacked any crispiness or rigidity, with a minimal amount of hardness able to be recognised with each bite. My teeth sunk into the soggy surface, rather than cracked through it. It really could have been cooked longer.”

“The centre was not a single or multi-layered scallop cut of potato, but rather warm, fluffy and somewhat mashed potato. The taste of the cake itself, however, was enjoyable enough, and I’m sure will be ordered at 3 am by many a drunken 20-something-year-old,” they added. 

A comment on the post called the new item an “absolutely horrid inedible piece of crap”. 

Well, well, well, if that ain’t a bit of freshly served McKarma. 

I’m yet to come across a review of the hokey pokey thickshake, but the Maccas website describes it as “the perfect summer afternoon snack … thick, smooth and deliciously creamy" - no mention of the chokehold that hokey pokey has on New Zealand’s summer, just deplorable really. 

McDondalds Australia new hokey pokey thickshake Credit: McDonald's Australia

The NZ Herald reports that there are no plans whatsoever for the items to come to our shores.